10-25-13 Our baby Kaleyah Joy Frederick is born!

On Friday October 25, we had a normal Friday. I worked. Joel and Elijah had Daddy day and spent a little time at pumpkin patch.  The bigs went to school.  After school and work we went to Pumpkin Patch with the Boyd School where Joel shared about his experience working at the Boyd School.  what he said to those boys was very encouraging.   He told them that God put a dream in their heart and to never let anyone take that dream away. He talked to them about Gods love for us and that Jesus gave His life on the cross for our sin.  I think some of them really listened.  Elijah spent the evening at  Boo at the zoo with his little buddy, Noah. After the Boyd School event was over we swung by to pick him up and headed home. We arrived at home about 9:30 PM. Caris was holding my phone as we got out of the car and headed into the garage and she said" Mom you have a text.".    The text said our birth Mom was in the hospital. She had gone a couple of nights before with pain and a couple of months before that she had gone and was diagnosed with a kidney infection.  Joel and I agreed that we should follow up on this.  We texted back and it was clear we were not speaking to our interpreter.  The text continued to come through that she was having a baby but not right now. We assumed it was another false alarm since Kaleyah was not due for 9 more weeks.  The texts continued. We would ask questions with no answer. Then the text came through at 10:30" the baby is a girl?"  Then more texts saying the baby is born.  Communication was difficult because I was obviously texting someone who spoke Marshallese and little English. And they put a question mark after everything.  After several minutes of texts that did not make much sense, Joel contacted our attorney and he called and confirmed that our baby girl had been born. He could not get any information except she was in NICU.  My first reaction was "its too early" and I wanted to cry but I immediately felt comfort as I was reminded that this was Gods story and He was not surprised at her early delivery. God had it planned all along.  Psalms 139 speaks of how God knows us, He created us. Verse 16 says "your eyes saw my unformed body. All the days ordained for me were written in your book before one of them came to be."  God ordained the night of her birth and I have to trust in His plan. The next day we had planned for my family to come over to our house, take the kids to Pumpkin Patch and hang out and watch the football game.  We do this each year to celebrate Dads birthday. However, our plans were suddenly changed. I called my Mom around 11PM and told her the news. My sister was at her house. She had driven in from Mobile that day and spent some time with her friends. I asked her to come and help me pack and clean so she did. She spent the next 5 and 1/2 hours at my house , being my brain since mine was not functioning at full capacity. She encouraged me to prepare for a miracle and pack things for Kaleyah. She was with me from midnight until 5:45 AM.  Joel slept so he could drive the next morning.  Isaiah was up with Joel and I as we were getting the news about Kaleyah. He kept coming in our room to find out what was going on. He was not reacting much but he later confessed that he was a bit nervous about the situation.  I woke Caris up to tell her that her sister was born. She had crazy eyes and it took a few minutes for her to understand what I was saying. I Told her Aunt Leslie was coming over to help me pack for our trip tomorrow. Caris got up when Leslie got there  She stayed up with us for awhile.  At some point she stopped and said "wait, Kaleyah is born? she's here?"  I explained to her that yes she was born. We laughed because she was so out of it when I woke her up she did not even realize what I was saying.  She thought the birth Mom was in labor but did not realize her sister had been born. Joel got up at 5:45 and we loaded the van and the whole family headed to Arkansas. We arrived at the hospital around 4:30 and Joel and I met Kaleyah Joy Frederick around 5:15. I cried for just a minute the first time I saw her but then I pulled myself together so I could hear and try to understand what the nurses were telling us.  This was the first time we had any information on her condition. They told us she was healthy for a preemie. She had no birth defects or obvious diseases. They said there was no condition which caused her to be born early, she just was. The sweet nurse Jessica explained how things work in the NICU and what we could expect from Kaleyah.  She was very good at explaining things in a way we could understand with out making us feel stupid.. She was a very good nurse.  The kids were not allowed to come into the NICU because of it being FLU season. They were disappointed but had good attitudes considering the seriousness of the situation.  Kaleyah Joy Frederick was born on Friday night, October 25, 2013 at 10:23 PM. She weighed 4 lbs and was 16.75 inches long. She was beautiful and had a head full of hair.  I'm here to tell you, when I laid my eyes on her for the first time, I knew she was mine. My heart felt the same as it did when I first saw Isaiah, Caris and Elijah.  They are all my children. God had given her to me in a different way but she has been in my heart since before she was in her birth Moms womb.  I can't say it was love at first sight because I had loved her since August of 2012. I loved her before I even knew her birth Mom. I loved her before I knew she was a girl. I loved her and prayed for her before God formed her. She had been mine all along. God had put me and my family on a journey to find her to adopt her as He adopted us.  Now I could see her, my baby girl. My beautiful island princess. Kaleyah Joy Frederick.  She is a miracle.   God put a love in my heart for this baby that He formed. He knew her before He created her and he created her to be my daughter. Just like He created me to be His daughter, and for that I can never thank him enough. 

Well I wanted to say that I am thankful for the arrival of Baby Samuel Leonard Yarbrough.  I am a bit late with this news.  Sam was born the end of August.  I prayed for this baby.  Sams Mom Michelle was the one God put on my heart when I first started this adoption process.  Michelle and I had never discussed adoption before. I had no idea why God impressed on my heart that I  needed to tell Michelle about our call to adopt.  I even kindof shook my head and decided God was not really telling me that. But I felt him say, she will walk with you on this journey.  I did not follow up with what I now know God told me to do.  Talk to  Michelle about our adoption.  On the day Joel announced to the church that we were going to adopt, I went to Michelle before church and told her that Joel was going to announce this and she said "We need to talk more about this.  "  later at our annual church picnic she shared with me that she and her husband had been considering adoption.  I had no idea.  Wow!  Who am I to question God?  I tell my kids sometimes that I always have  a reason for the things I tell them to do but I doubted God when He told me to talk to Michelle. I told Michelle what I knew God had put on my heart and now I knew the reason.  That was September 2012.  Now baby Sam is here.  The little guy I prayed for so much.  He is the 2nd Marshallese baby to come to our church. The first one, Natalie, was another special frined that I could not wait to share our story with becasue I knew her Mom would be interested in it.  Here we are one year later with Natalie and Sam home safe and sound with their forever family.  It is amazing to see God do what He says He will do.  He is faithful.  He calls us, he equipts us, He provides for us and sometimes He even  uses to accomplish His purposes in the lives of people around us.  He gives us special friends to walk our journey with us.  I feel like these babies are part of my family and honestly, they truly are.  They are part of our church family and our Marshallese family.  Sam is actually the blood cousin to our baby Kaleyah Joy so he truly is family.  But we claim Natalie too.  These three will be three peas in a pod.  I just know it.

This week we have celebrated a big milestone. Elijah turned 5!  Where have 5 years gone?  On Mo

nday, he had cupcakes at Boyd School and they sang Happy Birthday to him.  Tuesday Oct 8, was his actual birthday.  He went  to school and it was picture day so he had to dress nice. We had cupcakes at snack time to celebrate.  Then when school was over, his best bud, Gianni Brown came home to play. They played all afternoon and around 5 we had a Star Wars celebration. The Grandparents came over and one other friend, DJ Mizel.  He received Star Wars toys, Star Wars PJs, Star Wars video games and a nerf gun.  We dressed in costumes and had a Star Wars parade. Isaiah downloaded the Star wars them songs at Elijah's request. Elijah came out to the them song dressed as Obi Wan Kenobe and Gianni was dressed as a  Jedi Knight.  Then came Caris and Princess Lea and I as Queen Amadala. Last the music changed to the Darth Vadar theme song and Isaiah came down as Darth Vader. The two Jedis began to fight him and they won the Epic battle between good and evil.  Elijah said the Star Wars parade was one of his favorite parts of the celebration. He had a star wars cake from Publix that was super yummy and we had hot dogs roasted over the fire pit.  He played on the trampoline, play set in the back yard and in the house.  It was a really fun night.  The night ended with he and his big brother playing lego star Wars on the Xbox.  The big kids were really good to make his day special.  Caris has been practicing powder puff football.  She will play in the game in two weeks. She has emphatically begged me not to come watch the game. I even told her to stop cause she was hurting my feelings.  She is adamant she does not want me to come.  Isaiah rode on the Freshman float dressed at Buzz the Yellow Jacket in the homecoming parade tonight. He and a group of his friends went to decorate the float and prepare for the parade after school.  The sweetest thing was when he was in the parade and saw his lil brother standing on the side of the road he jumped off the float and ran to Elijah to give him some candy and a hug.  It was really sweet.  Tonight, we have had fun in our back yard hiding out and planning to sabatoge any yard rollers that dare come to the house. The big kids wanted to go rolling which we didn't really want  them to do. Joel told them they should stay home and help him booby trap the yard to which they surprisingly said YES!  Its really a good feeling when Joel or I come up with something the big kids actually want to do.  Its rare these days that they want to hang out with us.  Elijah and I laid on the trampoline for  awhile while the big kids sat in their secret hiding places with their attack plans ready. Isaiah and Caris decked out in all black while Elijah has on his Jengo Fett costume.  While we were on the trampoline I had to make  a phone call. Elijah got bored and went to the swing set with Joel for a while. Then he crawled back on the trampoline with me and said "you stink as a Ninja!"  I guess talking on the phone does not make for a very sneaky Ninja. It has been a fun night with the family, just hanging out together at the house in the yard. Its getting past bedtime. Caris is falling asleep on the couch and Elijah is playing his new video game. Joel and Isaiah are manning their post in case the rollers really come.  I think Isaiah has sat in one place for about two hours now waiting for his attack. I for one am getting ready to go to bed.  I'm thankful for my family and special silly nights like this where we enjoy being home and being together.  Even if we are planning to scare people in the dead of night.  That's what they'll get for rolling this yard!  LOL   The five Freds don't play.  :)

All in one day

When I came home from work and picking up three kids from three schools, I checked the mail.   There was a check made out to Joel that we were not expecting.  More adoption money!  Wow God, u continue to amaze me! Thank you for providing the way to Kaleyah Joy.  

Overwhelmed and overjoyed!

I want so badly  to sit and write for days of all the things God is teaching me .  But since I don't have much time let me quickly say that Lifesong for orphans just awarded us a matching grant!  Just this morning I was praying and asking God to provide for the adoption.  I know He's already got it covered.  However in my finite human mind I want to see proof.  God is giving me little glimpses of proof along this journey. Proof that He called our family to adopt Kaleyah Joy, proof that I'm not really in control of anything and proof that He is alive and working in our lives. And He is faithful to His promises. To God be the Glory!  Thank u Jehovah Jireh, my God who provides. 

Pink Snow cones are the best!

Its been a while since I updated. A lot has happened!  I have had technical difficulty so I apologize for the delay.  On August 2,  our family was in Dauphin Island visiting my sister.  We were on the beach. We were waiting to hear from our attorney about our birth Moms ultrasound.  We knew it may be sometime soon but we didnt know exactly when it would be.  As we were enjoying the beach, I was taking pictures for a gender reveal just in case we heard something while we were there.  Joel decided to take the kids for snow cones and I stayed at the beach with my Mom and sister.  I talked to my Mom about how I guessed we would not hear anything because it was already Friday.  I also told her that I had been planning a gender reveal where Isaiah would rap and we would post it to facebook. However, Joel would get the news first.  I wondered if he would do a gender reveal on me.  The timing was just perfect for that conversation because little did I know, Joel was planning my gender reveal at that very moment.  When he and the kids got in the car to head to Island rainbow, he had a text revealing the gender of our baby.  He didn't tell the kids but when they were ordering snowcones, he ordered a special surprise snow cone for me.  When they returned to the beach, Joel was taking pictures of the kids and I knew something was up.  Then he motioned for me to come join them.  He video recorded himself explaining to me that in the cup, which was covered with a paper bag, was the color of our baby's gender.  He told me to drink the snow cone and the gender would be revealed.  I was so excited and nervous at the same time.  As I drank the juice I saw PINK!  Its a girl. I started jumping up and down and screaming before my lips ever left the straw.  Caris my 11 year old patted me and told me to calm down but I was still jumping up and down and was so happy.  the kids were happy too.  Even little elijah said "Yeah a baby sister!"  The video is priceless and I will post it as soon as I can.

Next we celebrate Caris' 12th birthday on Labor day. We went horse back riding. The whole family went. It was a fun outing. The night before, Caris and I went to the late movie about her favorite group, One Direction.  We rang in her birthday right after the movie. It was a fun way to celebrate her last year before she is an official teenager.  UGH!  Im not ready for this! Middle school has been adjustment enough.  ONe step at a time.

Some awesome news is that baby Sam was born and is now home with his parents.  The adoption went pretty smoothly and after a two week stay in Arkansas, they are home adjusting to their new life.  Two down, one to go.  Its such a beautiful  experience to see babies that God put in your heart long before you knew them, here at home with their Mom and Dad.   Babies you have prayed for and details you prayed for come to life.  Its amazing how God moves and works in our lives.  Its personal. He knows us, He hears us and He gives us the desires of our hearts.  It has been wonderful to walk this adoption journey with these two families and its beautiful to see them now, with their babies.

Sams parents delivered our ultrasound pictures and video and a recording of Kaleyah's heartbeat.  That is a precious gift we did not originally expect.  To see her ultrasound photo and hear her heartbeat makes it more real, while still seeming like a fantasy.  Its getting closer and I will have a baby soon. Wow!  Its amazing to imagine.  I dream of dressing her and loving her and brushing her thick black hair.  I search  pinterest for ideas for baby clothes, photos and even first birthday ideas.  I cant wait to have her here.  Although I have much to do in the house to get ready.  I planned to use the month of Septemeber to concentrate on the house. Instead, Ive concentrated on work and being busy each weekend.  Oh well. It will get done eventually.

On the financial end of adoption, we were awarded a $1000 grant recently.  that was such a blessing. We are waiting to hear from Lifesong for orphans and still plan to apply for more funding. We are doing some fundraisers to help support our orphan ministry fund to help all three of our families and any others who decided to adopt in our church family.  I dont mention money to focus on our need but to give God glory for providing for this adoption through many different ways.  He is faithful.  On that we place our trust. Not on the balance of our bank account.

Last we just got back from a fun family weekend. We went to MS to my youngest cousins wedding and that was a fun event.  Visiting with the Stinson's is bitter sweet now.  Its always  good to see everyone but its a blatant reminder that my Daddy is not here and my Grandparents are not here.  However, we always have the Hope of eternal life.  I know I will be with them again whenever Jesus comes to get us or I die.  That will be a beautiful day either way.  After the wedding Saturday night we headed to Monroe, Lousianna to Duck Commander. Joel surprised the kids with this little trip.  We attended church with many of the Duck Dynasty stars.  We wmt a few of them and Isaiah and Caris got a picture made with Si.  We appreciate their show and their Faith which they openly share on the show.  They are the real deal. To see these stars and millionares in church worshipping with their family, is a true blessing.  It was a great weekend.

This coming weekend, I am looking forward to spending time with many adoptive Mommy's at the Unfailing Love conference.  We have 4 of us from church going and my neighbor who is visiting our church.  I cant wait to be encouraged and learn more about adoption and orphan care.  I know God will bless our time together.  Im really looking forward to it.

Oh and tomorrow is national talk like a pirate day!  I've heard that Krispy Kreme is giving away a dozen free donuts to everyone who comes in dressed like a pirate.  I will be pulling together my most impressive pirate costume tonight and head to Krispy Kreme in the morning. Don't be jealous.  You can go too.  Aye, aye Matey!

One down, two to go (at least)

Now it's public knowledge and I can share the awesome news.  Natalie Kate is home with her parents, Erick and Alyson.   There are two other couples on the Marshallese adoption journey with us.  We have met and talked and updated and prayed for each other.  When we were matched, we hoped and prayed the other couples would have babies before us. Erick and Alyson were matched three weeks ago.  Last Saturday morn they received a call that baby Natalie was born. A few hours later they headed to Arkansas to get their baby girl.  We had just arrived at the beach when we received a text saying she was born and they were on their way to get her.  As we have enjoyed our vacation with our family, we have been texting and calling and following the beautiful story of their adoption.  We are so thankful to our God for answering the prayers of many for this sweet family. I am so thankful to God for answering my prayers even down to small details.  As we wait for our baby to come in December it sometimes seems unreal.  But this is proof that God is moving and working in our lives and the lives of others. It is real.  So the next couple  Mike and Michelle are expecting baby Sam in August.  We continue to pray and anxiously await their adoption story to unfold. And then during the busy Holiday season, we will have our baby.  We hope to find out soon if we will have a baby boy or baby girl. We are planning our gender reveal so hopefully we will have some news soon!!  Until then my heart is full of our LORD and how He speaks to our hearts, gives us desires and brings them to fruition. One year ago I had never heard of the Marshallese people.  Now we have a missions partnership, new friends pastor Mithan and Mrs Robin Loska, and one baby home and two more on the way to be part of our church family and part of our hearts !  Praise be to our God.  I'm so thankful He allows me to be part of this adoption journey. I pray more will join us to adopt Marshallese orphans and orphans all over the world.  

Epic fails and fat lips

First of all, just let me say that I have had some very strange physical problems in the last two months.  I have been breaking out in hives multiple times per week and I have random facial swelling.  I don't mean my eyes swell or my lips swell.  I mean random parts of my face swell.   For example, one half of my bottom lip will swell up or one eye lid will swell.  Even one nostril will swell.  And when I have random swelling its never the same place twice.  U never know which part of my face will swell.  Lucky, it only lasts for a few hours.  I have been to the dr twice to try and figure out what is wrong with me.  The Dr says its due to stress.  I am going to an allergist soon to make sure these are not allergic reactions.  However, Im pretty sure i'm just a freak. 

Well we tried to Skype with our birth Mom tonight.  Let's just say it was an epic fail.  She could see us but we could not see her.  We were in a loud place so we could barely hear the translator.  We were all sweaty and things were chaotic.  Elijah was wiggling and acting silly as usual.  I felt like a crazy person smiling and waving at the iPhone without being able to see the people who could clearly see me. They were talking but I was not responding to everything they were saying because I could not hear them well.  

Our attorney told us it would be good for our birth Mom to see us and hear about our intentions to return to Arkansas yearly and allow our baby to keep in touch with her/his heritage.  He thought it would help her be confident we were the kind of family she would want to raise her baby.  

Well, we didn't get to tell her any of our future intentions.   I don't know what we said.   Who knows what she is thinking About us. I can only imagine.   She saw us as we really are.  She did not see the cleaned up, quiet, impressive family that I imagined she would see the first time we skyped.  We did not engage in a deeply meaningful conversation with her.  She saw the real, everyday, a little bit crazy Frederick family.  Hopefully we did not scare her.  

I was really bummed when it was all over and guess what?   The bottom left part of my lip started to swell. 

But the truth is, adoption is not a cleaned up, quiet and impressive situation.  It's messy, chaotic and crazy.  But God can make it into something beautiful.  God and onlyGod  is growing our family into  something beautiful through adoption.  On our own we are sweaty, chaotic and crazy but God, through His Grace, makes us beautiful, fat lip and all.  

Thank u LORD for this beautiful adoption journey. 

He Knows my name

Today I sat at my piano and cried.  I am taking lessons to help relearn all the things I learned as a young child and did not put into practice.  I want to play keyboard at church but I have a long way to go.  I am practicing some of my favorite praise and worship songs.  One song I was playing is "He knows my name". 

I have been  praying specifically about our baby.  Sometimes in adoption things are hard to understand. There are culutral differences, language barriers and legalities that don't seem to make senses.  To push through all the red tape and the obstacles requires so much prayer. I have been asking God to guide every step of this journey.  It is becomming more evident of the true miracle of adoption.  So much has to happen so many i's to dot and so many t's to cross.  There are many relationships formed and many hurting hearts to consider.  

As I sat at my piano playing the song "He knows my name", I thought about that sweet baby in the womb of our birth Mom.  We have 27 weeks to go.  So much can happen during that time.  I don't know what the outcome will be only God does.  We are aware that there are many risks.  God could have us on this journey for a purpose that is differnt that what we originally thought.  Our hopes for this journey may be different than God's plan for this journey. But we have to follow Him.  We have to accept that His ways are perfect even when we do not understand. His plan could break our hearts or bring us unspeakable JOY.  We just don't know what will happen. 

What I do know is He knows my name.  He knows my heart and my thoguths and my desires. He knows our sweet baby who is growing in the womb of someone else but who is growing in our hearts.  As far as I know now, that is MY baby.  I will pray for this little soul. I will pray for the birth Mom who is choosing life for him or her and she is choosing to give him or her a better life than she can provide. I don't know or understand what that feels like.  I dont know the depth of a Mothers pain who knows she cannot give her own child the life she so desires for he or she to have and I do not understand the sacrifice she will make to provide the best possible life for her child. 

I have no control over this child growing in another womans womb but I have control over the prayers that I  pray for both of them. I have control over the love I can offer to a Mom with a hurting heart. I have control over my obedience to do what God is leading me to do, no matter what anyone else does.  I have control over my choice to follow God's plan even when it seems to  not make sense and ohters just don't get it.  I have control over my choice to acknowlegde God and allow Him to direct my path.  I have control over my choice to lean not on my understanding. 

I do not and cannot understand the details of the miracle of adoption but I have been a witness of many miracles God has done in bringing other families together even when it seemed impossible. I am witnessing miracles and answered prayer in our journey.  Even this week, God answered a big prayer of mine. I know He's working in my life and He knows my name.

Mission Trip to Springdale Arkansas

Over the Memorial Day weekend, 23 people from our church went to Springdale, Arkansas to serve the marshallese people during their May Day celebration.  It was a great trip.  We were able to meet lots of Marshallese people, play with many adorable children and share the love of God with many people.

We set up tents.  Snow cones and hotdogs were offered at one tent. We had a prayer tent set up with tracts and Marshallese Bibles. We had a tent with games the children could play.  We had a tent where balloon animals and face painting took place. Our last tent was where a puppet show and crafts took place.

We had ages 2-60ish serving in different ways.  Everyone was busy and had lots of opportunities to interact with the Marshallese people.  One of the best things was having opportunity to support our new friend Pastor Mithan and his wife Robin.  It was apparant to us that he has very little support and help in the ministry.  He thanked us for coming and helping serve the children.

We did not get to meet our BirthMom.  We were told that she was out of town but we were able to talk face to face with our attorney.  Another couple from our group was matched just a few days before the trip and we were able to meet their birth Mom and watch as they begin to build a relationship with her that will hopefully last a life time.  Their match is an answer to prayer and their baby is due in August!  Wow, we may have a Marshallese baby in our church this summer.  God's timing is amazing. 

It was so amazing to me that God had brought us to this place, one step at a time. First was the call to adopt and my surrendering to it. Then the following God to the Marshallese people group. Then becoming ministry partners wtih Pastor Mithan and Cross Church.  Now we are here. Playing with beautiful Marshallese children and talking to parents, grandparents and many Marshallese people.  Here we are looking around at all God has done in our lives. It's amazing to see His plan unfold detail by detail and realize He has chosen you to be part of it. It's overwhelming.  It's amazing.  It's beautiful.  I'm so very thankful that He is allowing me and my family and friends to be part of His plan.

Wow!  I stand amazed, confident that God has led us here.  There is no way we would be here if He didn't. I can't wait to watch as God leads us through His plan for us as He continues to amaze me and perform miracles, one detail at a time.

We are Expecting!!!!

A few weeks ago I told someone that God knew we did not need a "match" with all we had going on such as the break in and all the end of school stuff and preparing for mission trip and Vacation Bible School.

Well one week after our home was broken into, Joel received an email from our attorney with an uncommon situation he wanted us to consider. He explained that one other couple besides us received this info and if we both said no he would move to another family. Birth Mom is 6 weeks pregnant and has had some high risk pregnancies before. Normally matches do not occur this early but this is a special situation. Joel and I initially said that we should pass because we were planning for a girl. We went in different directions that evening then Joel and I met up for dinner. The Lord began to change our hearts on our plan. When we met up for dinner we both began to consider that maybe God has a different plan than we do. Maybe this is Kaleyah Joy or maybe God simply wants us to let go of the control we think we have and follow Him. This adoption will be considerably more than we originally planned. However if Gods going to provide 18 thousand he'll provide 28 thousand. What's money to God. We discussed putting a fleece before The Lord and passing to the other couple and if they said no we would accept. We also discussed talking with our big kids and seeing how Caris reacted. she has her heart set on a sister and roommate. We discussed the reasons to accept and the reasons not to accept. The only real reason not to accept is because we may not get a girl. We realized that this us Gods journey and Gods plan. Before I ever even told Joel I was ready to adopt the Lord spoke to my heart and told me to Follow Him. So we finished a yummy dinner and headed to pick up our kids at Grammy and Grands. When we got there we told the big kids we needed to have a family meeting. We went to the sun room and explained to them about the call from the attorney. Isaiah immediately said let's do it. Caris thought for a minute. She said I think we should
accept because there is a reason God brought this baby to us. We discussed the fact that she could end up the only girl with three brothers. She fully Understood the situation and wanted to accept this referral. Joel was really overwhelmed and so we decided to pray. Isaiah voiced a prayer for Gods direction and we called the attorney and accepted. We explained to him how we believed The Lord led us to say yes when we thought we would say no. The attorney seemed very happy and told us the other couple turned it down quickly because they want a girl. So we accepted a match around 9pm on Monday night May 6th. So we r expecting a baby on Dec 26!!!! More details to come.

Love your neighbor

Love your neighbor as yourself is one of those commands that should come easy but it is so difficult. A few weeks ago my kids and I came home from school and Isaiah noticed the back door had been kicked in. As we looked through the house we realized a few things had been taken. A few things that cannot be replaced. Someone came into our home and took our things. God continues to teach me that things are just that, things. I was so thankful we were not home. That is what is most important. My family cannot be replaced. I continue to thank The Lord that He protected us all by allowing us to be gone to school and work.
So am I to love the neighbor who came into my home, stole my belongings and kicked in the back door? Am I to love the neighbor who has changed our behavior and who has disrupted our peace and security in our own home? The answer is yes. God said to love our neighbor. He tells us to do it. He never said love your good neighbor. That would have been easy but Jesus does not call us to do what is easy. He did not do what was easy when He suffered and died a horrible death just to give me a relationship with Him. I have kicked in Jesus' back door so many times and tried to take what was not mine forgiveness, mercy, Grace. Just to learn that Jesus offered it to me freely. I cannot take it from Him. He offered it to me and to you. All we have to do is receive it and Follow Him. It's not easy but it is a joy filled, amazing journey. I cannot say that I feel Love for my neighbor who broke into our house but Im trying. I want to love as Jesus loves. In light of the Love and Forgiveness I have received, I must love others.

Thank you Lord for your love which seeks us out and forgives us even though we do not deserve it and thank you for your protection.

Tshirts

We have our tshirts for sale! We are very excited. We are so thankful to Katy Wallace for designing them for us. You can order them here on our blog or you can contact us directly to order.  I want to tell you a little about our design.  It is very personal to us.  The back Adoption has a red cross. That is because God adopted us as His children.  The sentence that says God gets glory we get Joy, is one of Joels mottos at our church.Of course Joy will be our baby girls middle name(if we have a girl)  The white sun is from the Marshallese flag, which is the people group from which our baby will be born.  The palm tree represents the Marshall Islands where her birth family is originally from.  The front pocket design has the same palm tree and white sun. It has red flip flops because the Marshallese women wear flip flops. The verse says because of Gods love for us, we are called to be children of God.  Kaleyah-our daughters first name (if we have a girl). means "called" in Greek. So the verse talks about how we are called to be Gods children, a reference to adoption. Because of God's great love for us, He called us to be His children. He gives us all the rights to inherit his kingdom in Heaven.  He loved us, called us, forgives us and paid the price for our sin. His love is amazing. It is for that reason that we are called to be parents to a little baby, maybe a little girl names Kaleyah Joy, through the miracle of adoption.  We appreciate your support of our adoption, especially your prayer. That is the most powerful support you can give us. Thank you!!!

Waiting

This week  is the first time I have felt a bit discouaged and began to doubt that anything was really happening.  I was thinking maybe we are waiting for nothing.  Maybe we would never get a call from our attorney. Maybe she is working with so many clients that we have fallen through the cracks.  I talked with two of my frineds who have blazed this path before me but with adoption agencies.  They both said that this is normal during this process.  You get to that point where you just sit and wait.  One friend really encouraged me when she told me that the waiting time is when God worked in her life so much. God taught her to Be still before Him and wait on Him and His timing. I keep saying that His timing is perfect.  The truth is that I still want it in my time, on my terms and conditions, when everything is in place and ducks are in a row and we have our beautiful baby room (well half of Caris' room) ready and all the accessories and all the beautiful family photos of our family holding up a sign that says waiting for you or growing in my heart or something really cool like that.  The truth is that maybe God will use this time in my life.  There is no maybe about it. He will use this time. Time to teach me what is important. Time to make me dependent on Him. Time to show me what is important and that He is all I need. Not all the stuff. When I get totally honest with myself, it is not that I fear a baby will never come.  I fear that I will long for her and miss her so deeply before she comes,  that it  will break my heart.  I don't want to hurt. I don't want it to take long enough for me to ache for her. I don't want to get uncomfortable.  I want the picture perfect scenerio and then my beautiful baby girl will come home.  But what does God want?  Maybe he wants to break my heart for what breaks His.  Maybe He just wants me to Be still before Him and Wait on Him to reveal His plan.  And then, he expects me to be obedient, no matter how it feels.

Oh God, change my heart and help me to Wait on You, no matter what.

I did call our attorney and briefly spoke to her. She said no babies were coming her way right now.  

So we  wait.
Shannon

Maybe fall

Well we really don't have any major updates.  Our friends, two different families that are working with our attorney, are on board. We are all expecting and praying for at least 2 little Marshallese girls and one little boy this year.  We are so excited that each of our children will have friends at church that look like them! Joel spoke with our attorney a few weeks ago. She said we would have a baby this calendar year. No mention of this summer so we are, at least, not anticipating a baby during the hectic schedule of summer. This is a tiny bit disappointing but at the same time, gives us more time to prepare, increase the adoption fund, apply for more grants and pray for our baby girl.  It gives us more time to focus our attention on the three gifts God has already given us.
I've thought a lot about my role as a parent lately.  Parenting is difficult even in the best situation.  To teach and mold and inspire and encourage and train and discipline and shape a child is such an enormous responsibility.  Joel and I are the ones God has given this responsibility to for Isaiah, Caris and Elijah and one day for Kaleyah Joy.  I recognize so many failures along the way.  I don't correct with a loving tone,  I don't set a good example in some areas, I don't remember to follow up with everything I should,  I don't give enough hugs.......and the list goes on and on. But one thing I do is love them with my whole heart.  I would give anything to insure they are all happy and healthy.  I would love to be able to protect them from the heartaches of this world. It is that realization that brings me back to my most important responsibility as a parent.  Pointing them to Jesus. If I don't cook a well balanced meal, or I react harshly or I fail them as I do so often, if I point them to Jesus then I have given them the most important thing in the world.  Not only am I to point them to Him, I am to lead them to Him as well. It is what they see in their Dad and I  that will leave a spiritual legacy.  It is our example they will follow or at least learn from. Thankfully, they have many Godly grandparents, Aunts/Uncles and church family to help us lead them to Jesus. But WOW!  I have a lot of work to do in my own relationship with Jesus but He will help me. He will sustain me and He will forgive me when I fall short. He will give me what I need to give them what they need.  Thank you LORD for loving me, a sinner and for blessing me with these children. May I point them and lead them to You!

Well we survived the home study and will soon receive our notarized official copy. Then we continue to clean out the house,gather baby stuff, wait on a match from our attorney and save money.  We can apply for adoption grants after we have an official copy of our home study so that will be soon.  I am still working and that allows us to afford extra expenses or add to our savings account.
As I have followed other families in their adoption journeys, we are at the point where we are getting ready for some information.  We are trying to be patient. We want to wait on God because His timing is perfect. However,  not knowing how to plan the next few months is proving to be a bit difficult. I love to have my calendar in order and know when we are going where and what is going on in the near future. However, I don't want to plan or commit to too much because I don't want to have to cancel. Just not knowing. It almost seems it will be a long time before we get the call from our attorney but then it could be tomorrow. This whole thing seems almost unreal at this point but when we get a match, it will be all about getting ready for Kaleyah Joy.
Caris and I had a painting night last weekend where we painted some things for their room. Soon I want to paint the white tree on their wall and rearrange the bedroom.  It will begin to feel like Caris and Kaleyah's room once that beautiful tree is on the wall.
We have heard that one of our friends has received some great news about their pending adoption!  We are having dinner soon to hear the great news. We are very excited when we are able to rejoice with others as they work to bring more orphans home.  We have prayed that our adoption will encourage others to adopt. Another friend is feeling drawn to adopt and is asking us to pray.  I am so thankful that God is moving in hearts all around us to bring home orphans. To love the least of these and create forever families in ways none of us ever thought possible.
Until I have more thoughts or news to share, we will praying and Waiting on the LORD.

Rejoice! I'm 40!

This is the day the LORD has made, I will rejoice and be glad in it.  Ps 118:24   This is my Daddy's favorite verse. Today will make 2 years since I've seen him, heard his voice, gotten a crazy phone call in the wee hours of the morning, heard his funny laugh and so many other things.  But, its also been two year since he went to Heaven, since he stopped suffering, since he left this world full of sin and heartache, since he began his true life that God created him to have. Its been two years that my Daddy has been in the presence of Jesus.  I know I will be there with him one day. This is only a temporary separation.

Today is also my 40th birthday.  I thought my 40th birthday would be a hard day for me as far as feeling old and leaving my 30's.  I mean at least in your 30's you can still hold onto some idea of being young but 40, forget it, right?  WRONG  I am embracing 40.  My new motto is Fabulous 40!  Not that I am fabulous but I want to have a fabulous year and I plan to. I'm hoping to be a new Mom.  I mean Mom of a new baby girl. I also want to be a new Mom. I want to be a different and better Mom to all my children. I want to be a new wife to my husband. I want to be a new sister and daughter and friend.  I want to be a new follower of Jesus with the excitement I had when I first gave my heart to Him.  I want to be a new creation, by Jesus renewing me each and every day, teaching and molding me into whatever He wants me to be.  I have new hopes and dreams for this year and I'm so thankful to be able to dream God sized dreams.  I'm so thankful for all He has blessed me with in this first 40 years. I can't wait to see what He has planned for the next 40.


The latest adoption news is that we are still interviewing with our social worker for our home study. We have two more meetings and the last one will be at the house!  Yikes. I hope I will be a new housekeeper this year and get rid of lots of this mess!  Got lots to do. But once the homestudy is over, we wait for our baby girl.  Oh and we are considering changing the spelling of her first name from Kalea to Kaleyah.  Also, Elijah has said more than once that he is also getting a baby brother and his name will be Sharky Jordan. LOL  I guess this family will see what the LORD has planned for us and if our little prophet knows something we don't.  :)

Today is January 15th, 2013. I did not realize that this would be my first post of the new year.  Last Thursday I finally dropped our homestudy packet in the mail.  This was such a good feeling. It took me so much longer than I expected to complete it simply because I started the home study, a new job after being home for more than four years and went through the holidays with all that entails.  But no matter it is done now and we are anticipating meeting with our Social Worker in the next few weeks to have 3 to 4 interviews and then we will be finished with this part of the adoption.  Once that is complete, we are set to adopt.  We will simply be waiting on our attorney to do the rest.  We can begin to apply for Grants when the home study is complete.  I hope to design and order our adoption shirts in the next few weeks.

Joel helped the kids clean out their rooms the first Saturday in January and they look great. Caris still has more cleaning out to do and we have to decide which furniture stays and which goes to bring in the baby bed and dresser for Kalea. I am looking forward to working with Caris to design her new foom for two.  We painted it lime green last March and it looks great. So everything we do will coordinate with that bright color. I think it is going to be adorable. As long as Caris is happy with it, then I am happy with it.  We have high hopes to finish our basement room for Isaiah to have a new bedroom. Then Elijah can move his toys to his room and out of the living room, just in time to move a pack n play and baby toys into the living room.  I never imagined my life to look like this when I turned 40 but I cant imagine it any other way. I guess we may be retired and still have toys and kid stuff all over the house.  That is fine with me.

The big kids and I started taking piano lessons last Saturday. We had a great lesson and the teacher is wonderful. She has us all really excited about learning to play. The big kids are playing the piano every chance they get. I hope this enthusiasm  lasts for awhile. I hope they will both develop a love for music and develop their skills. Im thrilled to be refreshing my skills. I have been pleased with the things I am remembering and that my teacher is teaching me a new method from the way I learned years ago.  This will allow me to play in church whereas before, I could not do it. So I am excited to see how fast I can progress. I hope pretty fast since I will have a baby, hopefully soon.

Now I'm already distracted from the thoughts I was trying to blog because I'm dreaming of the call when our attorney says, "I have a baby for you."   I feel selfish because we have friends who have waited years for this kind of call.  Our attorney feels confident that our process will move quickly and that possibly Kalea Joy will be born in the summer.  Having said that, we don't even know her Mom yet but God does and we believe he will knit our baby together according to His plan  and in HIs time.

Back to my original thought.  I have been thinking a lot about suffering this week. Some of our dear church family will bury their 7 day old baby tomorrow.  Our friend had an emergency C-section last Monday and the baby struggled until Sunday afternoon when she went to Heaven.  Our church is trying to minister to them as best we know how.  As  I have prayed for the baby and now the family, sometimes I don't even know what to say. I say the same thing over and over. I finally began to ask God to hear my heart because I could not make sense of the words. As followers of Chirst, sometime we cannont make sense of what He seems to be up to. I mean, His plan, is not always clear.  To see a tragedy like this and this family who is heartbroken, is just hard to understand.  We pray and ask GOd to heal and to protect and sometimes we see that prayer answered and sometimes we don't.  I have another frined who struggles with family issues.  She prays for answers and solutions and sometimes there simply are none.

We will never understand the immense suffereing that some endure while on this earth.  I do know that God sees the whole picture.  There is an awesome song on the radio now that says "you're already there, at the end of my life, waiting on the other side".  God sees the end of His plan which He promises will be more awesome than our minds can imagine. We cant even begin to fathom what is to come but He knows because He planned it for us.  I do know that sin and death were not God's original plan but sin invited it into the lives of mankind.  While here on earth, we pray for miracles but we don't always feel that God gives us our miracle.  I think sometimes the miracle is that God simply carries us when we walk through the valley of the shadow of death or through the deep suffering.  We find ourselves living through the unthinkable, somehow and that is the miracle. God carries us through it and teaches us valuable lessons through the pain.  None of us willingly sign up for that class.  However, when we find our selves in it, God does not waist it. My husband has said many time, God doesn't waist a hurt. He grows us in that place when we think we can't breath or take another step or face one more day.  He moves us along this life toward the plan He has for us, not to harm us but to give us Hope and future.  Jeremiah 29:11 says that He has a plan for our life.  I heard one more new song on the radio this week and I thoguth of my sweet frineds going through the loss of their baby.  I cant wait to hear it again because the words are awesome.  It say something like "When I can't understand your plan, I still know Who You are.  If we know who God is, we can hold tight to that when we walk through suffering.  we can trust God has a plan to give us Hope and a future. And one day, we will be with HIm where there is no more suffereing, only JOY forever and ever. I can't wait until that day comes.